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4 months ago · · depressed,
I know it is cliché to talk about this, but some people are not as strong as other people. I am a 27-year old closeted gay man living a homophobic country. I have been feeling fine (well now I am not so sure) but I do not know why. I think I have reached my breaking point. I feel like I am suffocating myself and I cannot breathe. Right now I have the sudden urge to leave this country behind and go to another where I can be free. I can be safe, I can smile, I can be honest with myself, I can be happy. Why am I feeling like this. I feel so depressed and people would describe me as a happy go-lucky person.
But I am trying to be determined and believe the phrase It gets better. I will study hard, I will find a job to save money and be able to do what I want.
In case you are wondering, I do live in a Christian household and coming out is my greatest fear. I can just feel the disappointment in my parents’ eyes and how they will not see me like the same person as I was before. I know things will never be the same. Am I truly not destined to he happy??