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I feel alone. I’ve been attached to someone for about 7 months now. And they’ve cost me my whole life. I know it sounds like I’m exaggerating or being dramatic but im anything but that. I gave everything I had to offer to this friend. I cared for her deeply. And I saw her care and choose people over me. Even though she spent so much time convincing me or telling me that she does care about me, I refused to believe it. And me refusing to believe it led to so many things. I started getting panic attacks and had intrusive thoughts as well as suicidal thoughts. I’m now on medication and I’m finding it difficult to detach from her.
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I'm genuinely sorry I can't give advice BUT I TOTALLY UNDERSTAND YOU. I suffer with some yk mental things, and someone was in my life during a terribly hard time, and she was by my side the entire time. I can't count on my hands how many times she sent me paragraphs, came to my house, talked to me until early morning, etc, etc, etc. It hurts me because I can't get any closer to her? She tells me she loves me, sees me as a sister, cares for meall the time, yet when she doesnt hang out with me when I come home from school I get pissed. I convince myself its a one-sided friendship because I always tell myself shes lying to me when she says the kind and meaningful stuff she does. I WISH I COULD HELP. But maybe knowing that someone else can relate to you might make you feel better. Because reading this just took a little weight off my chest because I've never met someone who can relate.
ReplyI’m so glad to know I’m not alone and I’m sorry you feel that way
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