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To the Guys Out There (Please Answer my Question for You)

5 months ago · 9 · Need Advice, +10


302

Hello, boys. I don't care whether you are gay, bi, straight, trans, homophobic, allies, young, teenagers, adults, married, divorced, whatever. But I have a question. How would you want a girl to approach you? I'm a girl who has a crush on a boy I don't know very well in school and I want to know how men like to be approached as. It'd be really nice if you considered this in the view of a teen or young adult.

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  • Novni Guest · 5 months ago

    It depends on the man or boy.

    Reply
  • Novni Guest · 5 months ago

    Be nice, kind if possible. That's usually how most guys know the girl is interested. Also try to be and act interested in what they're doing. subjects, sports, hobbies, whatever it is they are interested in try to find things in common with each other. Find things to joke about and laugh about. Mainly just be yourself.

    Reply
    • Novni Guest · 5 months ago

      Thank you!

      Reply
  • Novni Guest · 5 months ago

    You already messed up because you asked how.

    If you set the precedent of the relationship for you to cow-tow to someone else's expectation in order for there to be interaction, then that's what it will always be - a transactional relationship.

    If their is not mutual and respectable attraction from two confident and independent parties, your going to eventually end up broken up or ( in a worst case scenario ) married with kids and a mortgage and hating every second of your life.

    Don't make the mistake most people make.

    You can't know another until you know yourself and confidence comes as a result of being comfortable with knowing yourself.

    I'm older now, but as a young boy, I didn't have expectations of girls approaching me AT ALL, let alone have HOW I would want to be approached figured out. Thats asking way too much from anybody and it is not how reality works.

    If its going to rain - its going to rain. If you like someone, try and get to know them. If it doesn't work out, then hey - we have a population problem. There are TOO MANY fish in the sea - there is no reason to frame a guppie.

    Reply
  • FtForger · 5 months ago

    I'm old...my eldest grabdchikd is probably about your age. I was on the other side of this same situation, back when I was a HS senior...she was a sophomore. She asked me to the Sadie Hawkins dance. I was over the moon...after dating for about 2 months, I was completely ready to marry her! (It never happened, but that is a long story and not relevant) . It was that simple...she came up to me, and pretty straight forwardly asked me to the dance. I loved it.

    Reply
    • Novni Guest · 5 months ago

      Okay... So confidence... Thank you this really helps!!!

      Reply
  • Bug · 5 months ago

    Here's the thing, it can vary from person to person. So figuring out how someone wants to be approached will only happen if you ask the person. What you need to be considering is what is likely to make a person uncomfortable when being approached. Setting up a time and place to talk, or asking the person if they are okay to talk at the time when you approach, before anything else. Preferably you'll have this conversation somewhere that is not crowded or that feels like the other is trapped. Be direct, don't dance around what you want to say. Make yourself clear. Tell them that you won't be mad or hurt if they say no. Essentially, just handle it respectfully and carefully. For some people it's an easy situation, for others it can be very nerve wrecking and uncomfortable. It's best to just prepare for the latter and ease as much pressure as you can.

    Reply
  • Novni Guest · 5 months ago

    From a biological standpoint, men might not want to be approached by a female at all. Men like to chase.

    Reply
    • Novni Guest · 5 months ago

      Ohhh... Okay this one made me smile :)

      Reply

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