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honestly i dont know how to describe the feeling I feel when I see you
you re like the brightest star in the sky at night
its like i m drawn to you
like an addiction
i ve never felt this feeling
its quite strange
i cant seem to do normal things I do everyday
all because of you
I can’t seem to stop thinking about you
What have you done to me
I want someone so bad who I know I can’t have
So stupid of me to think that you woukd notice me
Its sad
Its like when you re eating a chocolate and it just melts into your mouth and you re no longer tasting that sweet chocolatey taste
You re dissappointed
You de want to keep tasting that chocolate
Most probably you wouldve never had enough
Timeless
Thats how i feel when I m around you
Sometimes I think you re playing games wth me
Then I analyze things
I realize that you didnt even notice I like you
Im not good for this things
All I know is i know what i m feeling
And I pray to god that you re feeling the same thing
Feelings, so strong
But not yet satisfiend
Why?
I dont know what I m writing
Write now i m in a lecture
And i m writing this
Wtf?
I need to grow up
And stop this nonsense
Stop
You
I dont know how to write
This is actually very bad
But i just dont know what to do with these feelings
I will stop
Stop this nonsense
I m clearly invisible to you
At least thats how I feel
I actually love my boyfriend
Am I a bad person?
I definetly sure am
I think of him when I m in bed with you
You dont have a clue of whats going on inside my mind
I pity you honestly
You respect me
And love me
And I treat you like shit
And yet you still come back to me
Why?
Maybe because you dont have anyone else
Maybe because you love me
I definently am a bad person
I imagine him fucking and kissing me instead of you
I am so sorry
I think i love you
But if these thoughts run through my head
Do I actually love you?
I dont know
I m not sure
I m so sorry
I never thought I would do something like this
Not that I actually did something
But i shouldnt be thinking these thoughts
I am actually crazy
I fatasize about someone
Dream about him
He probably does not even know I like him
I stalk all of his social media
At least 40 times a day
I know all of his timetable
I know all his classes
I stalk his friends
His spotify
The music he listens to
I started listening to music he listens too
I am so distracted all the time by the thought of him
I m so unsure about what to do
Because i cant tell anyone about this
I have a boyfriend
I ve been with him for 4 years
I cant betray him like that
I dont want to come of as a sociopath to him
I know i most probably am
And now one knows about this
I mean, i cant tell
If i speak to someone about this
It would all just become more real
And I want this feeling to just go away
When I first saw him its like I ve known him for years
They say that when you feel this its because you ve know eachother in your previous lives
I dont know
Thats kind of crazy
I m tired of feeling fucking crazy
Fuck life
At one point i m happy
Others i m depressed
Thinking about how i cant be with you
Maybe you dont want that either
But if I dont have a boyfriend i would atleast try
But i love my boyfriend
Why would i do this to him?
If I love him i should be feeling these things
Idont know wth i m doint with my life
Im so confused
I wrote 730 words about a boy who probably does not know I have feelings for him
This is actually crazy
And quite sad to be fair
I mean, i feel alone
I came to a cafe alone just writing this
I feel like suffocating
These are very sad words i m writing
But thats how i feel at the moment
I am skipping all of my lectures
In the morning i am spending 2 hrs getting ready
Usually i spend 30 minutes
hoping he thinks i m cute
Today he didnt even see me
Well most days he doesnt see me
We only have one lecture in a week
Thats when we speak most
During our theatre lesson
I m so cringy man
Like wtf is this
I even followed his twitter
I mean
I am a stalker
But he is cute
He is very cute
He is very muchmy type
But i have a boyfriend
Who respects me
I m just going in circles here
I m writing this so i dont keep everything inside
I have to let my emotions out somehow
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you're not wrong in your feelings and you probably -no you do know him from the past that unfathomable feeling ask him if he feels it too. I wish I could tell you to try to fight it, but don't end up like me too scared to blindly admit and address the truth at least talk to the guy. Ask him if he feels what you feel guys usually don't show very well as for your boyfriend don't feel so guilty if you're already thinking about the other guy as silly and stupid as it sounds it is fate and dating others to get him out of your head only goes so far. I'm begging you personally to take your chance it's okay to be terrified just be yourself, but you have to take that first step or you'll regret it for the rest of your life talk to him tell him how you feel about him and why get that off your chest at least and if you don't do it for anyone else please I beg you do it for me.I usually don't do this but our storys are truly the same take this as a warning from an alternate future don't let it all be in vain -2222
ReplyTell him I would write more,but just get your feelings out-2222
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