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U ignore me and when I say something u insist u aren't but turn back away from me. I get upset and instead of comforting me u get even more mad than I am. And tell me I can take my attitude home. So I do, swearing to myself I'm not gonna call or text u. But deep down I know that's a lie. I know u have the hold out reserve of a fucking rock and I'll eventually give in. Which I do, 4 texts and one phone call so far. But I get absolutely nothing from u. No text and u don't answer ur phone. Ur driving me insane with this shit and I don't know how muchore I can take. But I keep taking it bcus I can't let u go. I have no trust for you, ZERO! Everytime we're apart I convince myself ur cheating on me playing grab ass with some other female probably my sister. And I'm infuriated. And I text mean angry things to u bcus I'm angry. Y do I let u have this control over me and do this shit to me? Y do u treat me this way? I wouldnt do these things to u and if I did u would blow the fuck up on me. Y? Y? Y? And I'll continue to let this go on bcus I can't quit u. I'll forgive u and not say anything about this bcus I don't wanna upset u. And u could care less. I fucking love u but I also fucking hate you. Fuck you!
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This is a form of gas lighting and it sounds as though he is manipulating you. You have to cut ties with him if you don’t trust him and he treats you this way. You deserve someone who will love you and console you when you’re upset. You should not have to settle for anything less than what you deserve. It will be hard but so so worth it. You can do it!
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