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I can't stop thinking about him. Basically since the pandemic started. I always do this when I'm bored and restless (and I'm not even that bored nor restless) . He doesn't deserve me and he's not worthy of me, hence why I stopped talking to him years ago. I've been good at not contacting him like previous times that I've let him go. But this time, i've been creeping him on his socials and tried to determine if his posts are about me. I know i'm not that important to him. He use to say I was but that was so that he could get in my pants. The truth is, he never knew how to fully respect me and it's a shame; it's a shame because I would've treated him like a true king. I damn near did for years and for free - with no status, no label. His kisses felt like love, his hugs felt like trust and his look felt like passion. If I were to reach out to him he wouldn't deny me as he knows I feel like home - - a home that has never faltered nor crumbled and managed to stay warm. I hope to find a man one day that will love me wholely the way that I will love him. For I am a queen looking for a king.
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