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To the ******* School District, and all teachers and coaches working with the Physical Education program
I am sick and tired of being treated like I am worthless because of the limits of my body. All my life I have been told that it is my fault that I can't run one mile without wrecking my knees for the next 2 days, that the crippling back pain is because I'm out of shape.
I have never been "in" shape. This is how I am, how many of us are. This is how it has been my whole life, though in recent years my body has been rapidly degrading around me.
The casual ableism is disgusting. The ideals of euthanasia of disabled people run strong throughout this system. I am worthless to you because of my physical weakness.
We were hiking in the thick of the woods. A small group of kids including myself who couldn't keep up trudged along, far behind the others while the teacher that had to watch us shouted insults at us.
She told us that if there was ever any danger, we would be abandoned in the woods. It was just natural selection. If we couldn't run away from the danger, then we deserved to die.
There is a reason that in the terms of the off-campus permission form, we cannot take legal action if someone dies. There is a reason why emotional damage is listed in these terms.
To you people, I don't deserve any of the love and happiness I have in life. I have no worth if my body isn't in top-shape.
Even now, my kneecaps feel moments from sloughing off of my legs entirely.
I had accommodations made, once. I went up in a room with stationary bikes and rowing machines while everyone else ran along hiking trails and roads, because I was too slow and nobody wanted to bother with watching me, making sure I didn't get lost.
If the others were running even just one mile, I would row for eight. After a while, I asked why.
The answer I received was that it was simply a punishment. To teach us a lesson for being weak. "It would be so much better and easier to be out there with the rest of them, right? This is supposed to prove that to you." We deserve to be punished for our physical challenges, according to the people you call coaches and teachers. You teach us nothing but that we are worthless.
Have you ever wondered why everyone hates you? Why a kid the other week poked his head into the gym and shouted furious profanities at you?
Its because to you, we are nothing but bugs to be squished under the feet of the strong.
"If your legs are so bad, why don't you see a doctor and get excused from Gym?" I've been asked time and time again. Did you forget that poor people exist?
My mother works in the hospitals, she has seen the carnage this pandemic has caused. She is not going to bring me there, even if we could afford all the consultations it would take to get a diagnosis worthy of your sympathy.
Just as with the rest of this shit country, you too think that we are disposable.
We are not expendable. We are PEOPLE.
Our bodies, abled or not, do not determine our worth.
Signed, a student who has frankly had quite enough of your bullshit.
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I agree that you should see a doctor and get excused from the gym.
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