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How do I deal with trauma and ptsd? There are so many bad memories and images that come to mind about certain things that happened. Those around me act like nothing happened suck it up life's cruel etc etc. Some of that from my abuser/s/ family. Then if I say anything I'm to blame NO MATTER WHAT because they have denial complexes and validation problems which I think they'd benefit from therapy. I never asked for abusive parents. You don't forget what they did to you or how you were treated. Such as how my dad treats his drug acquaintance like royalty and me like dog crap. When his other friend drug connection was alive (she died) he acted like she was a queen and I was a lowly peasant. He mourned over her when she died despite her and her man being 2 faced back biting. But he didn't look at that stuff yet can't being treated like crap himself. When he did that with someone else who is not in his life anymore he was like "don't be jealous of them". Right. Sure. Ok . Yeah. Uh huh. Sorry if I wanted my very own dad's validation to feel like I actually matter when many many times he makes me feel like I don't. If those drug acquaintances mean more to you than your own child well don't be surprised when you're all alone one day. And mind you when the one turned on him a guy treated him bad HE TOOK IT OUT ON ME LIKE A COWARD. WOULDN'T TELL THEM. He had coming how that guy treated him. It's ok dad it's not like I have feelings or anything. The only time he ever gets near crying is when hes out of drugs. There are multiple multiple layers of stuff that's been done to me I have to live with. Hell my own Dr was callous to me they know part of what I've been through. I hate feeling alone in this.
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