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I’ve discovered something I need to thought process out about him that is definitely going to be hard and sad for me to do. I’m sad just thinking about doing it. Once I discover the fallacy of my thought process and square away in my head the delusion that was not real, I will simply go on with my life. It’s funny how we imagine things about particular people, make them things in our head for ourselves, things they never really were to take care of ourselves because we needed to at that time. I suppose there was a reason for it. It’s been exhilarating focusing on something new, of course always with a touch of fun and delusion because it’s me, but fun even though. It’s all dark and grey when I think of him, and I honestly don’t think it was my doing. I’m learning that it’s not my place to make things happen and sometimes it’s okay to just observe and not take things on my shoulders that were never even mine to begin with. It’s nice to be free to just focus on the little things I’m blessed with. I would honestly die happy knowing I lived a good thoughtful life were I to die today. What more is there to do in this life?
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There are plenty more things to do in your life so go do some.
ReplyOh, you’re right. I haven’t done everything there is to do in life, so that alone is a reason I should be unhappy lol.
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