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I was molested by my father when I was 11years old. It continued for 4years straight. It still happened after that sometimes. He used to do it while I was sleeping. Idk if he still knows that ik he molested me. I was molested a few times right beside my mom! She was sleeping too. It's so hard to write all these but at the same time I feel so relieved. I didn't tell my mom ever about this. My mom loves my father so much and they are a happy couple. I don't want to hurt my mom. I don't want to ruin relationships. I don't want to break my family so I stay quiet. Sometimes my mom doesn't let me go out with my friends because she says she's trying to keep me safe. She says it's not safe outside for girls. We fight a lot on these reasons. I wish I could tell her I'm not safe inside my own home! I feel safer outside. For a really long period of my life,I was scared to sleep. I tried to protect myself from being molested and I thought if I sleep he's gonna come. I would wrap myself with blanket no matter how much hot I'd feel so that even if he comes,He can't do anything. I've never said a single word about this to anyone. I just can't. I again had a fight with my mom today. Sometimes I just wanna end everything. I just want to die.
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You should tell your mum all about this. Your dad shouldn't let your dad get away with it. It is a shame that so many men are doing this. If this keeps playing on your mind you should see a therapist. Tell your mum what your dad did and that you need to see a therapist. The therapist will help you heal from this and show you how to get on with your life in a healthy way.
ReplyI wish you could find the strength to tell her, but I know how it feels when talking only causes more trauma. Maybe like the other commenter said, ask to see a therapist, you don't have to say why. Then tell the therapist and let them tell your mom. This has to come out somehow or it will keep eating you up. It's much too heavy for you to bear alone.
ReplyI'm sorry that you had to go through all this I know its hard but death isn't the solution for everything u have a voice tell your mom so she could help you out I know its hard but but u still young live your life to the fullest work on yourself graduate and be the one who decieds to leave or stay you are strong and the prove is that u have been silence and patience all that time and please don't ever think about hurting yourself please u have a life to live
ReplyYou do not hurt your mom or anyone else by exposing what he did. Thatβs his fault, never yours
ReplyYOU ARE NOT HURTING YOUR FAMILY BY TELLING YOUR MOM!!!!!!!!!!!! PLEASE PLEASE TELL SOMEONE πππ
ReplyI'm so sorry for this trauma. I know that it can seriously plunge you over the edge to tell someone, but please try. It can even be to your extended family or friends. You wouldn't be breaking your family; you'll only be saving yourself from him.
ReplyI experienced the same. It's not my father tho, he's my cousin's husband, Also I wasn't really molested but his eyes were doing the act. Sometimes I would see him peek when Im showering and I really feel disgusted. I mean- Ive been living with them since I was a kid, it can even be said that he raised me. I've been living with them since I can remember because the parent I only have, my mom, was working overseas. I can't tell my cousin bcs i dont want to ruin their fam. I just plan to leave their house when I get into college. nxt school year im in my last yr of senior high. I will live in a dorm, I also want to get away here, but I have to persist for awhile. I hope we can be free from this someday.
ReplyWhat a brave and precious soul you are :)
They're not wrong, when they say that being too selfless can harm you :(
But trust me as much as we want happiness to stay.....it can't...not without a cause.
Also, the mother has every right to know.... as a wife and as a mother.
This is going to sound bitter but reality is bitter...Though, it is tough enough to heal you.
Even right now, you're not truly happy; you can't be... Not until you put an end to this.
You're scared of how ugly things can turn out to be, but that's the only way. YOU HAVE to tell your mom.... This way, she will be grateful to you til the very end. Trust me.
YOU WILL FIND YOUR PEACE AND HAPPINESS. π€
STAY STRONG BRAVE ONE :)
ReplyMay you gather the strength to tell your mother. May your mother gather the wisdom to believe you. May your traumatic episodes end soon. May the universe grant you the power to heal what is now broken. Truly lovely to see how much you hurt for your mother but you have to fight for yourself as well. Your inner child is crying for someone, anyone to help you. May you find the voice to help your inner child out.
ReplyI hate seeing people in these comments just saying "tell your mom"
I am going through the same situation and it's not that easy. i used to have this insane guilt that my mom would hate me because i didn't say anything before and the stress and depression that comes with this is frustrating. here's a tip- be more open about it. it's not your fault. you were just a kid and he was a grown man who knew what he was doing. try expressing your feelings out more. maybe a counseler at school or try telling these to people who you feel will support you because one day you will need to tell your mom and you will need someone to back you up just incase she doesn't accept it.
ReplyI am so so so sorry. This sounds horrifying. You deserve to feel safe everywhere esp in your home. I'm sorry. Please do whatever you're comfortable with, I'd suggest you tell her you don't feel comfortable at home and then if she asks , tell her. Break it to her slowly
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