I’ll Take It

Okay. My depression is not gone but it’s also not a high level, not even moderate (not quite). I’ll take it. There was once a time when it was high depression, the kind that cripples you, and you can’t even get out of bed and do what you need to do. Though it was brought on by drugs, it was depression even so. I’m now eight whole months sober, on my way to two years, where they say ‘you no longer have a serious addiction problem’. I know. For the rest of your life you’re the person who will never be like the normal alcohol/drug using population, you have this propensity to be keen to drugs because you’re an addict, and it’s not a totally curable disease, and you are not normal like them, because you will literally do it even through your life being in shambles. I can live with that too. I’m not alone. I even like it. Those are my people, my soul mates. I thank the Lord for that too, that I’m only on this (not quite) moderate end of the addiction spectrum. I can fall and jump back on easily and fly right like I should for very long times. I guess the Lord wants me this way to help others. How else could it be?