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A More Positive Note
1 month ago · · Relationships,
Usually when I write on here, it's because of my stress and only negative things in my life. However since I'm on the verge of entering adulthood, I'd like to enter it with some light and ramble about my boyfriend a little bit.
I'm not saying he's my only reason for happiness, but he plays a big part in in. As I lay here naked in the dark with a bright screen in front of my face, I have a stupid smile on my face as I happy cry. Just rethinking this past year really sends me through a spiral.
There were so many points where I just wanted to give up, and there was a lot of points where I was unhealthy. Getting into my relationship my boyfriend was more than aware of how mentally ill I am. Despite the rather large load, he was more than willing to take that on and guide me. He's only a year older than me, but he's definitely a lot better at thinking my emotions through than I am.
This man has been pretty important to me. He's not my first boyfriend, or my first kiss, but he was the first boy to give me flowers. The first boy that walked me home every time we hung out together. The first boy to actually sit down and listen to me, and be patient with me. I also know that I'm not his first girlfriend, his first kiss nor his first anything. But I can confidently say that he is my first real love.
I'm definitely in over my head, but he makes me so unbelievably happy. Even if it does end in heartbreak, I'll appreciate this chapter of my life with him. Because he made me feel normal. Someone can love me. For now it's him, and I'll be happy if that doesn't change.