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1 month ago · · borderline, · Explicit
I think I am happy but I can't exactly feel anything tbh it's like all my emotions are a fog no excitement. No sadness. No anger. I am just trying. Trying to give life a chance I guess after all I don't wanna end but I am always still sucidal I think bout dying all the time but I am trying. Trying to let life take me somewhere. Where I'd be happy but I doubt it. If you know what's borderline then you also know its a constant trying jus endless trying I have hypothyroidism too and I tried to be in a romantic relationship but obviously my body and mind jus had to ruin everything. He didn't leave me but idk whatthefuck is wrong with me I have no energy to wake up I don't have energy to try and look good I jus wanna hide. Away from the world I feel like a burden .I think I don't know for how long will I keep going I have a feeling day to end myself is coming sooner than I know myself I am jus tired of living idk why I am writing it here I guess I jus want someone to know I am trying to make others happy and to make myself happy I jus can't find peace in anything anymore not even praying or meds or bodies or anything