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Part 1:
In order for relationships and friendships to survive and get through the stormy seasons there needs to be a solid foundation. Unfortunately, the circumstances in which we met, and started things, prevented us from being able to properly establish that.
And while that doesn't change how I feel about you, and it doesn't change all that has happened in the two plus years that we've known each other. It does, however, leave us with some things that need to be worked out so that a solid foundation can be built. And so the question becomes, do we take this opportunity to try and build a solid foundation together (whether it be as friends or something more) or do we walk away and not speak again?
I would like to work things out with you. I am not here to get revenge for how I got hurt. I am trying to make peace, get things resolved, heal, and move forward. The issue I'm personally having, as I stated in my first post, is breaking down the barriers so communication can occur. And if you read the direct message that I sent you, then hopefully you would see that's what that was about.
"Identity your problems, but give your power and energy to solutions." - Tony Robbins
"Let's not forget it's you and me vs the problem... Not you vs me." - Steve Maraboli
"Without good communication, a relationship is merely a hollow vessel carrying you along on a frustrating journey fraught with the perils of confusion, projection, and misunderstanding." - Cherie Carter-Scott
Part 2:
Without getting into all the details on here. As our lives crossed paths, you had two different nasty break-up's back-to-back that hurt you badly, and I was going through my own set of life events and struggles. Over the course of us meeting and things progressing, I unintentionally started to develop feelings for you, and I told you that. But I knew you were not over your ex, so I attempted to put my feelings aside and continued to be there for you as your friend. Then as time went on and I got to know you on a deeper level. I started to fall in love with you, but I think you were oblivious to that. As you were still caught-up with your ex and all the pain and drama that had occurred and that was still going on. And so for me, I felt that it was a matter of unrequited love. I didn't feel loved back in the same kind of way or even loved for who I am. The love I have for you never went away. I've just been dealing with all the pain and heartache that came with it all. So to be clear... Yes, I still love you. Yes, I care about you. Yes, I miss you. Yes, I want you. Yes, I want to try to work things out. I'm just afraid of getting hurt again. And I am uncertain how you honestly feel about me and what kind of friendship/relationship you are seeking from me. I have no idea what your exact situation is really.
Under the circumstances and with everything that was happening, individually we both displayed our positive and negative sides. And while there's a lot of unresolved issues and unhealed pain. I want you to know that at your core, you have a good and beautiful (or I guess I should say handsome) sole, and I want you to remember that. You have a purpose for being on this planet and you have value. You are worthy and deserving of love and happiness. And I am sorry if I ever unintentionally made you feel the opposite of that.
"Love is a meeting of two souls, fully accepting the dark and the light within each other." - Unknown
“I find the best way to love someone is not to change them, but instead, help them reveal the greatest version of themselves.” - Steve Maraboli
"You cant make somebody 'get it'. Effort is a reflection of interest and you can't force them to see that you're worth it. Be wise enough not to waste your time, patient enough not to settle, and strong enough not to force it. Whatever is meant to be will be." - Robert Hill Sr.
Part 3:
If you ever want to talk again, then please reach out to me the direct way. We have already recently talked in the real world, so I know you know how to get ahold of me. And I hope that you read the direct message that I had sent you. I will no longer be on here as this is not a healthy way to communicate, and the stress from being on here is not worth it, so I will write in a journal from now on. I wish you the very best regardless of which way this goes.
“I surrender. I am learning to live between effort and surrender. I do my best and hope for what I want, but I do not resist the direction of the wind. Through surrender, I move from outer turmoil to inner peace. By letting go of expectations and outcomes, I transform a painful experience into a positive, fruitful endeavor. When fear gets the best of me, I surrender to love. When I release my resistance to love’s presence, I am able to receive what I need – what’s trying to come into my life, for my highest good.” - Unknown
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