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Any advice for how to just be friends while on a break with your boyfriend?
My boyfriend and I decided we are going to take a break from dating each other until we graduate college. We both just started our sophomore year of college and we have been doing a long distance relationship from for the past 1 year and 4 months. He lives 1800 miles away so it hasn’t been easy at all. Because of the distance, we have had a lot of communication problems. He isn’t a super emotional and talkative guy and I am very emotional and talkative. We don’t have any problems when we are together over the summer but during the school year it’s hell. I’m constantly crying because of how dry his texts are or how I’m not getting enough attention, he gets upset with me for being super clingy. It’s a never ending circle, so we decided to take a break until we can be in the same city again and so that we can grow as individuals. He is my first boyfriend so this break/breakup is my first.
What advice do you guys have on how we can remain friends (still occasionally texting abt how life is) ? We still love each other very much and it is because of this we are separating. How do I not stay attached to him and give him this space? For basically the last year and a half, I have become used to texting him every day and now that won’t be happening. Has anyone ever experienced a situation like this and how should I proceed ?
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I would say you should discuss with him what the terms of the break are cause for some people it means different things. That way you two are on the same page. You'll need to find a something else to do to replace talking and texting him. Like practice self-care, take-up a hobby, research something you've always wanted to know more about, or meet some new friends. Over time it will get easier. Best wishes.
ReplyWelp, in my life, my experience has taught me that the elements of romantic love are time, space, chemistry and compatibility. Without time and space, it's kind of like a flower without sunshine if there is no time and space for an extended period of time. There is hope however. So don't give up just yet. Perhaps try to find activities to keep yourself busy and make time go by faster, that way when you see each other it will feel like the time apart was nothing. Best of luck.
Courtesy notice: the following includes a reference to a book that contains writings over 2000 years old which are mostly parables about human nature, both vile human nature as well as moral human nature, parables that are meant to teach us to learn and grow, including the teachings of Christ Jesus. No religion required, and better yet: no public displays of devotion required, although the former and latter are admirable if practiced freely out of one's own free will and without the threat of being beheaded. Some bullies will label this "trolling", so "change the channel" now if of no interest to you.
1 Thessalonians 5:11
Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.
Mark 12:28-31
And Christ Jesus said the 2 greatest commandments are:
Love God first and foremost.
Love your fellow-being as you love yourself.
From following or not following these, all good or evil cascades, respectively.
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