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If you are in crisis and need immediate help, please call 1-800-273-8255 (NSPL) or text HOME to 741741 (Crisis Text Line). More resources.
I want to puke. I want everything to stop moving. I want everyone to leave me alone. I want to disappear. I want to leave this state. I want everything to be quiet- quiet without the implication of harm or death. Death can mean quiet- I don't want death. I just want calm and content and peace and no more suffering. No more suffering at this degree. Just regular normal human suffering that isn't continuous and catastrophic and inflicted upon us by others who have disconnected themselves from the rest of humanity. The ones with all the power because they chose to be cold and alone who want the rest of us cold and alone. I want to rest and feel at ease. I am unhappy. I am overwhelmed. I am mad. I am frustrated. I am sad. I am irritated. I don't like to feel this way. I am not okay. It's okay that i'm not okay. it's okay that i feel unhappy and it's okay that i don't want to feel unhappy.
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It's okay not to be okay, just remember, although you might not think it - you are worth it, you are valuable, you are precious and you are here for a reason. Don't quit, don't give up and grow day by day. Take it day by day, appreciate the bad times, appreciate the good times and reach out to whoever you can, whenever you can. You are certainly not in this alone, and the way you are feeling can be used to grow and become even more incredible than you already are.
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