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i wish i didn't feel this way

2 months ago · 2 · need help, +2 · Explicit


72

this is unfair. My crush/best friend just broke up with her toxic bf. The shitty part of my mind tells me to take her. Make her mine. But the sensible part of my mind is telling me, she probably doesn't like me back. Nobody does.

And I'd feel guilty if I did tbh. I hate that we're really close. When she tells me she loves me it echos in my head but instead of piping down it gets louder. It genuinely painful. I know she means it in a platonic way. I know i could just stop being friends with her but its hard man.

I love her as a friend and as something more. I hate how I feel so vulnerable around her. She makes me feel weak. I tell her things I've kept in me for so long (which I'd rather have kept to myself)

I don't understand. Why does everything she say sound so genuine? When she tells me she cares weirdly enough I believe her. When she says she's worried about me I believe her. Why do I believe her?

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  • Novni Guest · 2 months ago

    You believe her because she believes in you. Love is about being vulnerable and sometimes it can be scary but it can be beautiful. I think you may be in love yet don't want to admit it to yourself.

    Reply
    • anon_29 · 2 months ago

      thanks, that felt like a wake up call. but, oh god.

      Reply

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