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Idk what do i name it, maybe i am just being dramatic or maybe i want attention. I have an ex-bestfriend , it bothers me that we stopped talking out of the blue and now if we talk its like we were just schoolmates(we all have passed school in 2020). And its not like i dont have other friends i have some great friends and still it bothers me and recently it has started bothering me a lot , I tried to text her , I mean I did but she didnt sound interested ...so ...i guess i should back off.
The main thing is recently i have been idk what but i just turn on my spotify and i want to listen sad songs and as soon as that happens i just cry and think like i have no one , i am filled with tears recently but after a while when i am with everyone that includes my family i am all fine , i think I am ,i mean, i just dont think about other stuff anymore when i am with them and when I am again alone my eyes have tears . I have an exam in three months and its a very important exam , so i just study most of the time and dont actually go out , because most of my friends are busy with their exams or with their college , i am not in any college yet.
I cannot eat anything without regretting, i will eat anything and be like "shitt, you ate so much , you shouldn't have , you should stop eating you are gaining weight " and i have gained weight . I look at my last years' photos and i was so fine but now i am getting fat , i dont want to get fat. And the worst part is i cannot stop myself from eating i mean i dont eat a loot i eat the least in my family but i do eat. Last year i actually stopped eating , i just used to eat a meal a day and idk why it was just i didnt feel hungry anymore and maybe that is the reason i lost weight so i want to do that again.
I dont know what is happening , its like no one is there for me even though people are there , my parents themselves are really good , they understand things but i already think i am a burden on them as you know I should have been in the medical school like 2 yrs before but i am unable to clear the exam (i am 19 yr old)...i just .god i want to come out of my brain....
SO WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME, MAYBE I JUST WANT ATTENTION?
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Eat from small plates so that you don't eat as much. When I wanted to lose weight I bought those shakes that you have instead of a meal and used a diet. That worked. I lost 4" from my waist.
If you are crying when you are alone you could be depressed for some reason or grieving the loss of your best friend. Perhaps see a doctor for a check up. Best wishes.
ReplyWhat's your backup plan? When is your time for enjoyment? If you have no answer for either of these then consider the pressure and lack of enjoyment is probably having on your mental state. Everyone needs this occassionlly ❤️. Maybe you just feel alone.
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