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I met this girl over the summer when I was a camp counselor we hung out a little bit here and there but I never thought we were close. Apparently I left quite an impression on her though because she’s been texting me a-lot and now she just invited me to her birthday party. The problem is she’s like 4 years younger than me and lives literally hours away from me. There’s no way I can come. She told me she knows I live hours away but was still wondering if I would come to her party. I don’t understand why she would even ask that. I don’t know how to tell her I can’t come without hurting her feelings. Like how do I politely tell her I can’t come?
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It's good she's aware of how much trouble the trip would be. I think it's safe to tell her that's why, and she'll understand. If she doesn't understand, or if she gets mad at you, then that's sorta creepy and you're best off avoiding her before she gets real possessive. But it sounds like she's considerate enough to know it's a big effort for you. I think you'll be safe if you just say, "Hey I'm sorry I really can't make the trip. I wish we lived closer, but unfortunately not this time." If you really want to go the extra mile you could send her a gift in the mail, but that's totally optional and beyond the call of duty.
ReplyYou have nothing to shy away for. You're telling her the truth.
ReplyI think you can say Sorry that you can't come to her birthday because you lived far away. And also state your reason why you can't come aside from you lived far away.
ReplyIt sounds like she's become quite attached to you - almost "idolises" you a bit. I know that feeling, I've been in her position. Just let her down gently - as someone said, say that you're sorry, it's too far for you to be able to travel, but you hope she has an amazing day. If you send her a text on the morning of her birthday to wish her a great birthday, you'll absolutely make her day (just mentioning because it's a small effort from you, but I know from personal experience how much something like that means). I know it's probably really annoying for you, and of course you're not obligated to keep contact or anything, but the kinder you handle this the happier she'll be.
ReplyThanks I just told her ofc I’d love to see her but I don’t think I could afford the drive rn and I asked her what day her birthday is so I can text her happy birthday at least. (I’m not sure she’s aware it’s a 4 hr drive haha)
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