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i love you. i really do. i feel happiest when im with you and only you. and im gonna say it rn: it was all my fault idc if u say u fucked up it was all me. honestly, that whole week i was in the dumps probably bc i got my period for the first time in 8 months and some other stuff that i will probably tell you but this is public so no. i know i messed up and i know that i probably followed my first dumb thought of ending it which is what i always do but this time it was hard for me. it just made me uneasy knowing that you could totally date someone else while you were dating me just like you did with loading. i'd feel bad if i was her but i was in that situation as well and i know im the bad person so i really shouldnt be talking. what else pissed me off, oh yeah seeing you online and my naive self expecting a text then seeing u with another girl yk? like stabbing me but i get it i hang out with people whenever ur not online but when u are i try to text you when ur ok bc i dont wanna push buttons. ig im nice or ignorant like that. but i miss you like a lot and i dont say that to most people especially my exes. i usually have a girlboss moment and parade around now that im single but thats not the case. within what a week 4 days i already tried to commit and woke up 4 days later in a hospital and now im gettin beat up with therapy and rehab and im bein admitted to a mental hospital soon. not that its ur fault. its mine. my fault for not trusting ppl i love the most. my fault for not moving on from past experiences instead of attacking them and letting them tear me apart. i hope that one day u enjoy christmas and the holidays and i hope work gives u a break bc u deserve way more than that. im sorry. i really am.
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Man, I honestly can't relate to the parts about rehab and therapy. All I can say is I used to live without building my faith, and I was living in darkness. I hit rock bottom and gave faith a chance, and in my experience building and keeping faith is a journey, but a journey worth taking. Best of luck.
Courtesy notice: the following includes a reference to a book that contains writings over 2000 years old which are mostly parables about human nature, both vile human nature as well as moral human nature, parables that are meant to teach us to learn and grow, including the teachings of Christ Jesus. No religion required, and better yet: no public displays of devotion required, although the former and latter are admirable if practiced freely out of one's own free will and without the threat of being beheaded. Some bullies will label this "trolling", so "change the channel" now if of no interest to you.
1 Thessalonians 5:11
Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.
Mark 12:28-31
And Christ Jesus said the 2 greatest commandments are:
Love God first and foremost.
Love your fellow-being as you love yourself.
From following or not following these, all good or evil cascades, respectively.
Love...that powerful, invisible force that cannot be denied; even atheists live and die by it.
Replyi wish he would see this,
update: he has another gf, another girl he now talks to for hours, another replacement.
Replyplay "Cry" by Cigarettes after sex
the perfect song to play in the backround
Reply