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I can’t tell this to the people that I have to, so I’ll write it here.
I’m going away for a while… My spirit is broken, my soul is bruised and my heart is tired. All the problems I’ve had throughout my life don’t seem to go away, they don’t seem to become any less hurtful. The difficulties keep coming and every time is worse than before… So, I think it’s time to go… I hope that in many many many years, all the people I love, you’ll come find me and we’ll be happy together… Forever.
Now, S, I have to explain this to you, and I really don’t want to hurt you. The choice I’ve made is not something I rushed towards or something I want to do. It’s just the only choice I see for me to get away from my pain. I know it’s gonna make you sad. I know you won’t understand how I can do this. I know you’ll be mad… But I’m really tired… I’ve been strong for everyone for so many years… But this last decade had broken me.
All I want you to remember, my S, is that I loved you and I always will. More than myself. More than anything.
And, like I said, after many many years, please come find me. I’ll be waiting for you.
I’m sorry.
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Life has ups and downs. You should try to find a reason to continue living.
ReplyI promise you, they'd be better off with you alive. No one wants you gone. And this life is already temporary. Enjoy the music, the wind, colors and all it has to offer while you can; this is your gift. Stay a while longer for the music.
Reply