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The sentence - "Im still in love with my ex" is not a sentence I can say is true anymore, but it doesnt even feel like a lie. I feel like im weirdly stuck in between. I cant tell if its either that my heads ready to leave but my heart isnt, or my heart is ready to leave but the brain tries to justify it. But I do know that at no point do the both of them want to be true at the same time. I hate you for that. Because you werent a shitty ENOUGH person, but you also werent a good enough friend. So, here I am unable to decide whether the rational me should assume or no. Its why sometimes I wish you were shitty to me from the beginning so that I could have no expectations.
I know your heart deserves a chance at happiness, but did it have to come at the cost of mine? Was I so disdainful to you that not even a grain could be left and salvagable. I hate you, I will always until I finally remember nothing.
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