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This home isn't home anymore. Each day it's getting harder and harder. I love my family but I just can't anymore.... I wanna escape from here as soon as possible. I love my dad I respect him I understand his sacrifices. But I can't use this as an excuse to justify what he's putting me through. I can't put up anymore. I know he loves me and he's doing a lot for me but it does not justify what I'm going through because of him. It's like having a caged bird that you show love. We buy them everything, we look after them, we show love but we have them caged thinking we are protecting them. That's what my dad is doing. Each time i try to understand thinking ok my dad is sacrificing a lot for me n i sympathize. But my mental health is getting fucked up every day. Alone in my room with my earphones and my phone you know how it feels. Sometimes I feel I should just ruin myself cause however good I try to be I'm blamed and criticized by him. Then y should I try hard to be the good daughter. But I can't do bad things either. Cause I love my mom. I want to give her the world. I'm just putting up with all this shit just to become better and be in a good position when I can stand up for myself. I neglected my brother as well I know he was suffering too much cause of my dad. It was too much for a little kid to carry on his shoulders. I failed as his elder sister. I'm going to give him all the love and gain his trust one day i hope he forgives me and loves me back. I'm just waiting for the day I get to escape from here n do what I have to do to be a proud sister and daughter for my brother and mom. And it's not to long for that day.
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Good on you. That's what I did - wait for the day to escape from home.
ReplyI have a similar situation but whenever i think they are caging me i always think that there might be some kid who is wishing that they would be forever locked if they get whatever they want,trust me you are not living in a jail, when i had to go for studies i kept thinking about coming home i didn't wanted to go outside anymore, complain a little to your parents but never say that your home is caging you,the older ypu get
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