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Idk where to start from. Should I tell about the imaginary world i have created and made it a big aim to achieve in my life or the reality of my life which i am trying to run away from. Should I start from the weird dream or scene running inside my mind or the small lovely moments i had with him in my fucking real life. IDK.
Idk why i messed up everything. Idk why i started imagining about some person who doesn't exist. Idk why i thought about the imaginary world and tried to change it into reality. Why did I leave all my lucky charms back in my heaven and ran towards something i thought would be a greater heaven only to realise it's the dark hell. Why couldn't i support my friends, family and even myself? IDK.
Idk why i took everything in a negative way. Why did i cover my real face with the face of some nerdy , innocent face. Why was i soo obsessed with my imaginary world that i was ready to do anything even if it's to do something really bad. Why did i betray everyone? Why did i think that the person in my imagination was THE ONE whose gonna save me from all those whom i thought are the fucking shits in my life. Why couldn't i respect others? Why couldn't i respect even myself? IDK.
Now i have lost my identity. I don't know who i am. I don't know. I don't know
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