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It was when my mum died that I started to experience the turbulence that leads people to talk about how 'life is tough'. Up until that point in my early twenties, I had practically no worries.
After that day, I started to think back and realise that the only reason things has seemed so easy is because I had beem so immature, selfish and naive. Complicated events were taking place all around me and all I ever thought about was myself.
Now, as the years continue to pass I'm feelin as though I'll never return to a point in my life where everything just feels 'ok' and balanced. I wonder if I'm just going through a phase, or is it really a life long feeling? The feeling that things are just a bit messed up and that's how it is.
If that's true, I just don't know how to think about it all whilst staying positive. Maybe this is just a phase and I'm simply 'growing up' all over again. Either way I'm finding it particularly tough to the point where it's affecting all aspects of my life in what feel like one way changes.
I hope I'm able to get some clarity soon, I can't carry on sailing with no sight of land for much longer.
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