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Hello. I am 40 y.o. woman. Not married (already passed that experience). No kids.
No job either. And that's hard. VERY
Anyways. I just wanted to expresse my urgent need of feeling loved. In person. Because all my friends live for away.
I need a hug. But not for once and from a stranger. From someone who claims to love me. And stays by my side with respect.
I always attract guys who only wanna f----. It's so boring. I want to be challenged mentally. I want to meet someone I can learn from and admire to. Kind of like that.
Because I don't receive love in such a long time, I forgot what is to give it. I lost empathy and I don't like that. I don't smile "for real" anymore: is just a reaction. But is empty. There is no love in my smile. And there's no more "sparkle" in me (I think).
I wished I had good parents. I didn't.
I know the majority here doesn't have them. And I'm pretty sure most of the people here is VERY nice people. It seems almost like a proportional ratio. The more lovable the personality is, the less good parents they have. And many times that made them go south.
I wish God granted me "no more worry about the money" just for surviving needs. I am not greedy. I never was actually. But I can't understand His plan with me.
He got me like this since a decade at least. And I keep making efforts, but is difficult to trust "this too shall pass": is like, BS! I am in a bad situation 14 years ago. 😅 Or since I was born lol ~wirh a very few moments as exceptions.
I have a little rose tattooed in my right cheek. No colours. Only thin and delicate lines. That's why my nickname.
I wish I have a big brother who understands me and I can talk to. I actually "take borrowed" a fictional character and the actor who played to have imaginary conversations about the things that worry me. Like tonight.
I wish I could go to sleep heavily every night, without any worries.
One of my dreams came true. The bad news is: I have no more dreams. I am 40 in a bad situation, I never thought of being like this. And is difficult to think about a new dream under this circumstances and at my age. I feel so old even when I'm not. But I guess is the tiredness.
Thank you for listening.
I hope YOU DO have a night 💤 💤 💤
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M34 here, I understand but I've never experienced anything like marriage
ReplyWe were young. 22 to 27 years old. Datingnsince 19 and long-distsnce since 17 years old.
Marriage change your life, if you take it seriously. I did. And it hit me very much and badly when it ended.
ReplyWhat country are you in?
ReplyHello. I am from Argentina.
ReplyIts unfortunate you feel that way. My thoughts are to not put much faith in "gods plan" put your mind to one thing you want a be determined to find it. If you want to find a good guy, start going on dates. Join dating apps and stick with it. I met my wife in plenty of fish over 9 years ago and I am so grateful that I stayed with it. I went on so many bad dates with people but I knew what I wanted. Don't waste your time with someone if you know right away they're not for you. Hop right back on it and keep trying. You're bound to find someone. Just stick with it and focus on what you want.
Replygood advice. Thanks.
To be short, I am doing that right now.
I went back to a second meeting with a support group called "Neurotic Anonymous", because A. It's free, B. It's a support. This time, decided to look help.
I have some issues as a result of traumas and not having a job and living under my parents roof is not helping me AT ALL. So at least, that second meeting made me good. And now, I know how to focus those meetings. I am learning to take care of myself at the same time.
So why do I name this? Well, that way I will learn to trust myself, my body, my knowledge, my experience and by consequence, to trust people WITH COMMON SENSE. I think that's a great way to get to know someone good (in life I mean).
I won't waste my time, as you suggested. I got back on my feet and I will keep trying. Better guided now.
It's a difficult and scary way towards me!! I recognise my fear now.
Thank you for your time. =)
All the navigators here are very kind for sharing and caring for others, somehow.
Best regards !!
Reply