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I remember the first time we met. I remembered your name which is rare for me considering I have a bad short term memory. You offered to grill me chicken for dinner but special because I couldn't have certain spices or sauces. You kind of burnt it but it wasn't that bad so I let it slide. I got you glancing a couple of times but I didn't think much of it. By the end of the night we were sitting next to each other I showed you how to use different apps on your phone, you know because I'm so tech savy and you, well you're not. We laughed and had a pretty good time. You didn't ask for my number right away it took you a few days to find me on social media but you found me and added me. In the beginning it was nice you know. We'd talk about random things, swimming, weed, sports, life pretty much. We would talk a few times a day on social media and then eventually it was every other day. You were interested in my day and I was interested in yours. We started to hang out more and then...you...made me kinda like you. I didn't want to. You knew I was in a relationship, a long term one at that and right away you were so quick to say "I don't want to get in the middle of that", I can hear your deep calming and skeezy voice saying it over and over. Saying that you didn't want to meddle in anything, that you didn't have "time" for anything serious. But you had time to brain wash me into thinking I wasn't happy anymore and you were just about the only glimmer of hope I would have for a while. You had time to convince me I'm not a bad person but made me do things I promised to myself I'd never let happen. You had time whenever I didn't and I changed my whole plans just to see you. For a while you were nice and kinda sweet but that all changed the second you got what you really wanted from me. You went from being "the guy version of me" (which is how I described you to my best friends) to a complete low life stranger who only had his own agenda regardless of whether it fucked my life up or not. You would tell your roommates, my friends, that we weren't a thing, that I was annoying and clingy. Meanwhile you're BEGGING me to come over, to come upstairs and to come down to your level and for what? For you to get off and for me to lie there acting like nothing is wrong. Like nothing I'm doing in that moment would hurt anyone but me? You had me completely blinded and foolish. Fool me once, shame on me. I get it. Fool me twice, shame on you. Fool me three times....I'm a fucking moron for thinking you were anything better than a no good fuck boy with no ambitions and nothing on the brain except sex and money regardless of where it came from. I honestly thought for a minute or two that we were friends of some sort, not even the good kind but something. I was wrong more wrong than I have ever been about something. You taught me a lesson...to never set yourself on fire for someone who would only watch you burn. So thanks for ruining a small chunk of my life I'd like to say I could have done it without you.
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