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i got into this deep rut like four-ish maybe five months ago and it's progressively gotten worse to the point i just don't want to live anymore. it's been a little while since i've felt this depressed and i'm not sure who to turn to or what to do. i feel so alone and isolated although i have "friends" but i feel like none of them really care about me. like the other day i had a mental breakdown in front of people and even cried but nobody even did anything like ??? i also talked to my mom about my depression and she just told me "you're just going to have to know things will eventually get better." i can't even turn to my closest family members, not even my sister whom i'm closest with. she's always busy with work, writing, and talking to her friends it's almost like i don't exist to her anymore.
i just feel so awful and shitty every second of every day and nothing seems to make me feel happier. i've been gaining weight even though i've been trying to lose it and i can't even look at myself in the mirror anymore. i've been breaking down and crying more often at school and i seemingly can't concentrate on things that are important. my insecurities and mental stability are just getting worse and worse, i can't stand it anymore. i just want all this suffering and sadness to stop. i just want to feel loved and appreciated.
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Please don't feel this way.
I have been where you are....im a teenage girl still going through obstacles, lets talk?
ReplyEarlier this week I went through a long stretch (felt like it last forever, it was a blur so I cant pinpoint how long it lasted) where I was just /done/. I was ready to walk out into my high-crime level neighbourhood and did not give a single fuck if someone/something was to kill me. Dying or living didn't matter anymore. School didn't matter. My family didn't matter. Everyone I'd tell wouldn't take me seriously. The only thing that kept me alive was a crisis number I had to call and the next day I went on an adventure to the waterfront in my city so sit quietly and think. I also got to see my psychologist which helped.
That kinda helped me, hopefully it'll help you?
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