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You probably already know what this is about,its about how much i hate my father and why i hate my father.
I am his first child, the eldest. He used to give me all his attention when i was way young but as i grew older, He stopped caring about me. All he cares about is my brother and my sister.
When im really sick and so is my brother, he wouldnt ask me how i am or take care of me. Instead he would tell me to get up and take care of my brother who is two years younger than me. He is 17 and im 19.
He screams at me over every little thing, He thinks im dumb and stupid and cant do anything just because i dont get good grades no matter how hard i work. I asked him if i can be a lawyer, he told me you dont have the mental ability to become one and that really hurt. He cant talk to me with a straight face he just talk to me angrily. He makes me repeat after him if i dont do something he liked.
He called me downstairs to sit downstairs so that i can receive them when they come from school and when i said i have my workstation upstairs and everything is upstairs and if i tell him im working up there, he says angrily come downstairs work downstairs.
I bring all my stuff with trouble and when i complain just a little that i was doing my work in peace, i could have just came downstairs when they come to open the door but he starts screaming at me "You better fix your attitude, you repeat after me 'Yes dad, i will try' I didnt want to do it i was hurt by what hes making me do, but then he got mad and said really loudly 'REPEAT WHAT I SAID' and i repeated as if im a little child and need that kind of treatment.
Im 19 years old for gods sake and hes treating me like nothing.
What do i do? Should i try to kill myself, i wont actually kill myself but ill harm myself really bad like about to kill so that he realizes that im his daughter too, im not just a servant in his life that he asks everything to do for. I get him water everyday, i massage his head, i do everything he asks me to do.
Should i run away? What should i do im helpless :(
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Don't run away. Know that this isn't it for your life. You will eventually grow, become independent and call your own shots.
Reply(By they coming back from school, i mean my brother and sister)
ReplyI realy don't think you should hurt your self at all
ReplyStop massaging his head and get some family therapy with him. He’s seems to be lacking some parenting skills, whichever be due to him being a single dad or otherwise troubled psychologically and emotionally.
I’m sure it doesn’t have to do with his love for you.
Sure he loves you, he just seem like he’s under a lot of stress, and can’t handle anger and stress very well.
That’s his problem.
Family therapy please
ReplyHi, so I'm a bit younger than you but I am experiencing the same thing with dad. I know how frustrating it is to have a favoured younger sibling. (Younger sister for me) . Firstly, whenever the situation gets really bad i go to my mum and talk to her. Even though my parents are divorced it helps. If your mum isn't there go to your most trusted person like a friend or other relatives. it always helps. Secondly, write a letter to your dad. Whenever I tired to talk to my dad it always ended up in him screaming at me so I decided to have a try with a letter. It was a miracle, he actually said sorry and tried to be a good father. Furthermore, don't kill yourself. Find a n activity you can do to keep your life moving, such as a sport or an art. Focus on this rather than your father and don't let him treat you like a servant! Just ignore him and focus with your life .
Reply