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I'm just a big failure. Even the simpliest goddamn thing, and I just can't handle it. I try, trust me, I try. But I feel like I'm walking on a goddamn minefield, or on thin ice; You never know when you blow up or go through the ice, but you're damn sure you will.
I'm in a relationship in which all my opinions seem to be wrong. If my girl says something that makes me upset, I cannot speak about it. If I ever dare to speak, the result is a fight and then the ring is thrown across the room. Again. And to make things worse, that is the biggest fear I have. The fear of losing her and our four month old baby boy.
I'm just a big failure.
"Sometimes it feels it would be better for you all
if I ceased to exist or was never born at all."
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You're not a failure. You just need motivation, encouragement and to believe in yourself. I know the feeling and how there's this heavy weight and hard to get through too.. Perhaps, try another approach to speak to her about an issue you like to discuss with her. If she doesn't cool off walk away and give her some space and yourself to take a step back before freaking out.
When we get mad we say and do stupid things. Also when there is alot of build up we have an outburst it happens.
Tell her how much you love her and you little boy. You're not a failure you are just going through a difficult time.
You will be okay and things will be okay.. I know how hard it is. Hang in there.
You're here for a reason.
ReplyYou succeeded very well in expressing yourself there! That has value. Put that value to work in the place where it's needed.
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