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What My First Year of Motherhood Has Taught me
By Novni Community Member
As my son's first year of life came to a close this weekend, I ask myself, "What have I learned from my first year of motherhood?"
Well, lots of changes for sure, I believe I have grown as a person, almost nothing went as planned, and you don't realize how fast time truly flies until it's the day after their first birthday.
- My perspective and outlook on life has changed almost entirely.
From what I eat, which words I let slip out of my mouth, how many times a day I pray and put my trust in God, to actually caring about politics. Everything I do now, I have to think of my son first, and make a decision that will be in his best interest.
- Worrying about literally everything.
"He sneezed, he must have the flu!"... Ok maybe not that extreme. But I do have those nights where I hold him as he sleeps, and all the awful things that COULD happen to him run through my mind until I'm in tears. Or, another example; when he is "going through a phase" shaking, so you rush him to the nearest children's hospital around to make sure it's not seizures.
Or when all his past doctors have told you the knot in his back is just a harmless cyst, but you think the worst, and take him to the children's hospital to have them check it to make sure it's nothing cancerous. Yep, I'm that mom. I also worry about what he eats, because I don't want him to become obese, unhealthy, or develop health problems because of what he eats. The list could go on, and on, but I never truly knew how much worrying came with having a child.
- Things will never go as planned.
You have plans at 3:00? Plan to be there at 2:30, and you MIGHT make it there by 3:00! Babies are always in need of our attention, including the ten minutes most mothers have to get themselves ready. Not to mention all the last minute things that tend to happen as we're about to walk out the door. Such as, explosive diapers, and your 9 month old getting into a bottle of baby oil you forgot to close and put away, in the thirty seconds you were gone from the room. That was a fun day. -_-
- Breast is not ALWAYS best.
There will be heartbreaking moments that won't go like you expected. Breast feeding is a huge controversy lately, but I'm here to tell you from experience; when your baby is not latching on, or won't eat, when your milk is making the baby spit up constantly, and when you are doing everything you can to increase your milk supply, exhausted from newborn duties, and pumping every 3-4 hours to the point you can't even enjoy time with you new bundle of joy. Breast is not best.
When mom and baby are BOTH happy, and enjoying feedings, baby is getting the nutrients he needs, FED is best! You may have moments where you feel you failed at your motherly duties, but I promise, you have not. As long as your baby is getting the nutrients he needs, whether from breast milk, or formula, that is what matters!
- Sometimes you just need a break, and that's okay.
I have my son 5 full days a week (I work 8 hours a week) every week. It is very seldom that I get a break or a night to myself. So some days are harder than others, and I feel as though I'm going to pull every strand of my hair out. On some of those days, my wonderful husband comes in from work and gives me an hour or so to relax and have a break. All the while, as I'm soaking in my bubble bath, I'm missing the screaming, cranky child I was so anxious to get a break from. The struggle is real.
- There is no greater Joy then watching the perfect little human you created grow and learn.
From the normal milestones, like crawling, to learning how to blow kisses and belly laughing, it makes my heart smile to know my beautiful boy is learning so many new things, and that I have been privileged to be his 'teacher.'
- Lastly, always count your blessings.
Complaining and wishing you had this or that will get you nowhere in life. So instead, look around. Do you have a home? Maybe not a fancy mansion, but do you have a bed to sleep in, running water, food to eat, and a messy house? You are blessed. Do you have a family, friends or people that care about you? You are blessed. Do you have a healthy, happy child? You are beyond blessed!
Parenthood isn't always easy. Mothers usually do more than their fair share of the work. But it is so worth it, and is the most rewarding job title I have ever held. Becoming a mother saved me, in so many ways. I wouldn't trade a moment of my crazy, hectic life for anything! My son is the one boy that I will Always need, and I pray that he will always need me. ❤️