All the things I wish I could say on social media but usually keep to myself

I used to be autistic but then I bought this Illuminati cure-all elixir off the Mariana Web now I basically act like Don Draper and talk at the world with my penis extended three feet out ahead of me.

You should try it. It’s fun, and if any meddlesome family members or useless friends tries “getting you back onto the reservation” just have Jabba The Hutt shit in their mouth.

Problem solved.

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