Thoughts

Possible trigger warnings (just a rant anyway so just ignore)

I'll be honest idk how I'm supposed to feel. I have mixed feelings. I'm not a cruel human being but my dad has been really cruel and mean to me in the last 3 years. He told me to go commit suicide once or twice ok. On top of physical assaulting me. And tell me stuff like YOU FIGURE IT OUT about stuff in a cruel cold manner. Yet

Ok he's out of his drugs now has been for days. I didn't sleep all night and when I actually did get to sleep I was having a really good dream then here mom comes in calling my name to wake me about dad "wanting more of my meds" because his blood pressure is 200 heart attack and stroke level and won't go down unless he takes my meds.

That's not my fault ok. He did it to himself. He sends mom to ask me like a coward too afraid to ask me on top of it. He should go to the hospital. How would you feel if your dad did that stuff to you? I keep telling these people IM ALMOST OUT OF MY MEDICATION BECAUSE OF HIM FOR FUCKS SAKE THIS IS NOT MY FAULT. They just say "yeah". Like they don't care. Oh so n so is "supposed" to comein today. 3 days I've heard this similar statements. Ok I'm almost out and I'm fucked if its not replaced

In angry frustrated and torn how to feel. I don't wanna to run out cold turkey of meds because of his idiocy ABUSING his own but I have very few left now and I'm worried ok. YOU DO NOT GO COLD TURKEY ON THIS MEDICINE. How many times does he gotta do this to learn? I'm tired getting fucked over every which way but loose because of these people.

What next they gonna want my blood n organs too? I mean they did take my bank accounts so I mean they don't know when to quit. And dads got a he'll of a drug problem but won't do anything about it. I'm sick of this shit. I wish somebody would come rescue me and take me away from here. Dad's been a thorn in my side ever since he came here. Family dumped him on me tired of him without telling me about his leeching drug addicted ways. Alm i can do is pray and hope for the best I guess sigh

Comments have been disabled by the author