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Ugh. It's been like 2 or 3 days almost no sleep. Up the entire night last night. I'm a total basket case right now. Idk this time why I can't sleep. Its usually people disturb me or noise this time idk. I think too much for one thing. I know this is new years Eve. I so miss parts of my childhood. Can't bring it back though. Life has been hard this past 3 plus years. Primarily because of fighting with family and stress. They completely take my joy sometimes they're bitter sour ill and mean. Such salty sour puss joy drainers unpredictably. I'm approaching a part in life I should have been far far well off than I am. I would've been had it not been for using thieving manipulative drug addict parents. Dad never learns his stupid pill addiction he won't try to change. Same old crap every month. Gets drunk mean abusive then sobers up acts like nothing happened don't wanna hear about it. HOW THE FUCK DO YOU AND MOM EXPECT ME TO KEEP SILENT WITH SO MANY FUCKED UP ABUSIVE MEMORIES???????? YOU FORGET IT DAD I CAN'T!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I WISH I COULD. Plus you all both invalidatie me I'm always wrong most times.
Sigh anyway I pray 2022 will be a better year. I desperately need sleep
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