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I may as well write a little. Today was anything but a normal Christmas. I stayed away from parents mostly. They're still edgy irritable unstable.
You or mom can't blame me for being angry for having to give you dad my meds ESPECIALLY WITH ME TAKING THEM TOO. That idiot. I shouldnt have pay for the consequences of him partying on them 2 weeks ago. That's his foolishness. Im just getting lower and lower on them now😠😔.
I get angry and mom knows the whole situation all too well she blurted out to him 'you worry about today only not the future". She says to me " be nice be nice" insinuating id ruin Christmas because it makes me mad Everytime I have to hand dad my meds. He can't go without them yet don't care if he runs out or not when drunk. Until he gets sober then its ðŸ˜
Oh sure he's talking a big game getting help just not putting action into it. Well I just don't want to run out of my own for his foolishness. I shouldn't have to be doing this to begin with its bullsh!t. Mom doesn't care it don't affect her she even takes up for him saying to me 'oh I don't want you to run out either BUT...just as long as baby gets what he wants they'll do anything. Until his dealer comes through then he'll go back treating me like garbage.
Mom should tell him get help or get out. She would me no doubt. In having to suffer double because of him Drunk and sober. Drunk he's hell when he becomes a raging maniac cussing screaming. Waking us up all hours til he gets enough and finally passes out in his chair or slumps over withface kissing his table. And sober he's so edgy I'll shaky nervous you can't speak to him only certain times he's all over the place being hateful going all to hell if the dog barks.
Excuse me for being tired of all this. Especially his mood swings and hateful treatment.
Any way Christmas I slept til 11. Had no presents. Nobody said Merry Christmas.
I was depressed laid back down til 230 to keep away from my parents from fighting. About 430 mom made homemade spaghetti. Then about 6 we all ate some chocolate pie. Otherwise wise I stayed away from them alot besides going around mom some and petting the dog messing with him playing. With joy and love drying up in our family idk how long we'll be together. Dad is driving us all crazy by his mental behavior too. Mom can hardly cope so she smokes a lot. I shouldn't have to pay for his foolishness. That's plain wrong. It ain't my fault a Dr won't give them to him he only abuses them anyhow those from his dealer.
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