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I don't even know like what to say ive been awake all night. Literally so sore I can hardly walk idk wtf is wrong with me between back and leg related. I didn't do anything I'm aware of to harm myself. But. Herniated discs and degenerative disc disease runs in my family unfortunately. I was told years ago I had a bulged disc in my back and thr degeneration I was treated like it was nothing. Though pain was only somewhat minorly off and on (everyday with my rough hellish anxiety inducing stressful job though) and bearable then. Also don't know if I pulled a leg muscle over doing myself because nobody can walk the dog but me here. It's a real m f er. What irks me too is despite mom can't get around well dad can walk better than me though he has other issues but is still a manipulative drunk. I hate pain. Apparently pain meds are really frowned on by most Drs in my town and pretty much as hard to find as a live unicorn according to what I've heard about my aunt Dr shopping. But ok why are they even still manufactured then if they're not available for those who legitimately need them in severe pain. Sure I know lots overdosed on them in the past before they declared an "opioid epidemic".
My point(part of it) is I'm in pain hurt like a mother fkr I need something to help with my issues.
Other part of my point: This crap didn't start until my own Dr raised my leg up like a month ago to diagnose sciatica I guess because I told the symptoms I was having. I wasn't asking for drugs btw either just telling my actual symptoms. I wasn't hurting then like I am now either . I'm sleep deprived so I'm probably rambling idc though.
Also I didn't hurt to the degree then like I do now. I'm wondering if theyre responsible for triggering what's wrong with me now. Like Im not some friggin junkie or something I just need some relief for my pain and to find out what's wrong with me and causing my issues. Its so frustrating 😔. Maybe something will work out. Idk. Just simply pain sucks. Its like 6:29 am havent slept a wink. guess that's all for rn.
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