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I’m sure most of us had imaginary friends when we were kids right? I didn’t.
Actually, my “imaginary friends” came much later, and by later I mean 14.
I never had more than 3 real friends. When I moved, I had and still have no friends.
I developed people in my head, I thought of them like counselors in my head. I would run my thoughts and body, and these little people counseled my emotions, attitude, and memories.
At first, you may think “You are so childish” but hear me out.
When I did this I could control my emotions better, I could “kill” or “send away” certain people in my head, hence, killing a bad habit or thought.
Nora, the adult in my head. She's mature, she helps plan my colleges and gets my portfolio’s together, she’s independent and smart. She loves learning and she's my creative side. She’ll pay the bills, and score that driving test. She plans my future and looks for a potential partner. She keeps all the anger issues in check. She’s been here since I was 13 and will never leave.
Jasmin, my crazy side. Adventures, thrill-seeking, adrenalin junkie, and fun. She keeps me from dying of boredom. She planed my RV trip after college and is the only extroverted side of me. She seeks only the funnest of activities to do and loves a good thrill. She was born with me.
Lola, the stupid romantic side of me. The one who gets soppy, lovey-dovey and cute. She deals with the crushes. She’s naive and doesn’t understand the whole “keep people away so we don’t get hurt” thing. She's the hopeless romantic that comes out when I’m watching Arya and Gendry in Game of Thrones. She's the one who fangirls over things and creates little movies of what a perfect relationship would be. If she leaves, I’m doomed. She’s always been here. She can be pretty annoying though.
Skylar, oh jesus. She came when I was 14. She's the rebel, dark-humored, scary, lone wolf, troublemaker side of me. She has a lot of control. The reason I’m the biggest tomboy. She loves video games and is a badass at COD. She has a really bad temper and it gets out of hand, a lot. She's the bad girl, the “wtf are you doing” one. She’s responsible for the haircut, tattoos, and piercings.
Mina, I don’t even remember how she got here. One day It was all great, then she ruined it. She’s the horror story of my poisoned mind. She does help by blocking people out so I’m safe from disappointment but that's it. Depression, social anxiety, the panic attacks it's all her. She worries and over thinks everything. I’ve tried, but she won't leave. Somedays she’s dormant, other days I think she knocks out everyone else. She hates me and I hate her most days.
I’ve already killed off Natasha, she was cringy, clingy, attention seeking, and was always worried about what others thought. She made me gag.
So you see, as crazy as it may sound. I talk to them in my head, I’m not crazy, I’m not sick, I’m just human. And our conversations are the best.
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You are not crazy at all. Having these people in your head are actually healthy, especially when you're stressed and you don't want to turn to anyone else. I'm someone who doesn't like being around people and though i don't have people in my head, I talk to myself. It helps relief stress for me. Don't think it's crazy. Its a good thing.
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