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Today I went to the supermarket,
I didn’t have anything to buy, but I didn’t have anywhere to be.
Today I just walked around the supermarket,
Because its easier to waste time then to admit that to much of mine of free.
Today I sat in the café, not because I was hungry and not because I should,
I just sat amongst the people, because there I was doing what everyone else would.
It’s easier to mimic and pretend than it is to admit that you are alone and lacking a friend,
I have contacts in my phone, countless people I have met,
And yet I maybe only call 3 of them, is that something to regret?
They say quality over quantity and I wholeheartedly agree, but the quality is reduced when they are no-where near me.
Its no one’s fault we all lead different lives. We all make time for each other the time provides.
Miles separate me from my friends, a phone call bridges that but after a while someone ultimately hits end.
The phone will hang up and then I’ll be alone, left to do nothing so ill play candy crush on my phone.
I know that I don’t have it bad and my situation could be worse but, everybody’s struggle is relative to their own.
My struggle is that I feel empty once I’ve checked off today’s to-do list. Going the extra mile has me saying ‘I honestly can’t do this’
Independence, whether it be in my course work or at home has be feeling lost and alone.
I know I have it in me, I’ve seen it before but its hard to make things happen when you can barely get out the door.
I don’t need a hand to hold I just need a voice, one in Leicester that’s not my own.
Because my voice lies. Sometimes it says awful things and because it’s me why wouldn’t I believe it?
My mum tells me this is good that I don’t have distractions, but that then means I should constantly be doing and I cant…
Distractions can be good, can’t they?
So today I went to the supermarket because here, no one knows I’m hiding.
I’m just someone in the supermarket amongst the other people buying.
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