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I posted a question on Quora. I asked:
Should I break up with my bf? We have been together for 6 years. I'm not happy. If I do break up with him, I'm living hours away from my family in a house with him. He pays all the bills. I can't drive. I have a cat and a kid. I have no money.
There were only so many words I could include so I'd like to provide a bit more information.
Yes, I do love my boyfriend, I did not move in with him to take advantage. We have been fine for a long time, but things are getting stressed. I moved in with him right after college. I made it clear with him that I intended to pursue my career in art and that I might not make money for a while. He said it was fine and he would support me until I get my art career going. It has been 3 years since I moved in with him. I am making some money, but it's only enough to cover my cell phone bill and my student loan bill every month. I am making more and more money every year, but he is stressed and peeved that I am not making enough to pay a portion of the bills yet. About a year ago, I adopted my nephew because my sister was put in jail ( I talked it over with him and he agreed to it, and I believe he loves him). That is the kid I was speaking of. I also got a cat around the same time for emotional support to help with my depression.
The reason I'm not happy is because I can feel the stress radiating off of him. But he doesn't say anything. He keeps his emotions in until we have a fight. Then it's "I feel like you're taking advantage of me." But I'm not trying to take advantage of him. I knew it would be hard to start up my art career. I took a chance moving in with him so far from my family. I just feel like he's giving up on me. Like he doesn't believe I can succeed. And that's why I feel like I made a mistake moving in with him. At least if I moved in with my family and we had a long distance relationship, I wouldn't be as scared of being kicked out.
I'm pretty sure he wants me to get a normal job, but I don't want to give up on my dreams and I don't want my dreams to become a hobby. Maybe it was a bit drastic to consider breaking up with him, but I guess I was just worried he might break up with me first, which isn't a good reason. I have a plan to finally make more money by the end of this year that I'll be able to pay a portion of the bills. I hope that will be enough to relieve some of the stress between us.
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why dont you use that as motivation to get even better at art, use it, feed off it, surpass your limits and show him and everyone around you that you can become the best
ReplyI'm really trying to, and I am making more money, but I don't think it's fast enough for him. The only thing I can do is keep pushing and hope he realizes how hard I'm trying. Starting in August I'm going to start giving him $100 every month to use on bills or groceries or whatever else. I know it's not enough, but it's better than nothing at all.
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