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So, I guess this'll read as stream of thought. It's honestly kinda stressful to have these time constraints. 40 seconds, 50 seconds, time time time timetimetime time god it's so stressful. It makes me want to die. Well, not die. Just to stop. Like sleep, forever, but not die. You know what I mean? I don't want death, because that's the end, but i want to slip into a coma. Just a dream. No time constraints, overstimulations, betrayal, worries, or whatever. Just me. Just dreams. I want a nap from life, but I know I'll wake up. I'm too much of a coward to do anything about it though. They say people would be sad, but honestly, would they? I don't know. I guess I'll never know.
Wait? There's not a real time limit? It just stressed me out only to shrug it off. Do you think death is like that? You go through the stress of life, eventually being left to decay? Or is there an afterlife? Can it be that easy? I mean, there has to be an answer, a reward for not killing yourself. Because god, sometimes it seems really easy.
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In a crazy weird way, reading your post seemed like a symbol for your struggle with overstressing and thoughts of death.
You spent all this time in fear worrying about this perceived end, and once it came you realized it was nothing to worry about all along. It was an illusion...that life keeps going. Just like this entry kept going...I think theres ur answer
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