What are you looking for?
I don't know how to talk to people
5 years ago · · Need Advice
I never really learned how to talk to people.
Oh, I know the basics like 'How's it going', 'Good Morning', 'Please', 'Thanks', all that, the bare minimum starters to conversations, and also questions like 'What's your favorite thing?', but beyond that, I never really learned the way of holding a conversation beyond a few sentences and then silence, and thus never truly made friends on my own up to this point in my life.
I was the 'shy child' when I was a kid. Everyone else seemed to make friends and talk to others as naturally as breathing. While the others played together, I seemed to wander the asphalt or grass unless joining a group that was recruiting members for their games. Later on, as a teen I wasn't 'shy', I was able to talk to others without real fear or nervousness, but I had the definite disadvantage of not quite ever knowing what to say to progress or jump into a conversation. In high school it was the same, people talked and made friends as naturally as anything, and I always wondered how they did it.
I know now it's a form of practice, like any other skill, it gets better the more you use it. But that didn't change the way that I felt then in school. As if there were some sort of solid barrier between them and me, that made them somehow better. I walked the hallways alone, I ate alone, I studied alone, and always just pulled a book out whenever it was allowed talking time. I hated myself for what I was and what I couldn't do, I compared myself to others and envied them for being able to do such a thing so easily.
I wondered sometimes what it would be like to walk the halls with someone else by your side or eat with people at lunch. There were times I longed for it, but for the most part, I was generally used to being on my own at this point. It had always been this way. Life after high school was much the same and unfortunately, I haven't progressed much in this skill. But I have a much better perspective on things now, such as it's useless to compare yourself to other people or care too much about what others think. And I don't hate myself anymore, just the way I can never seem to advance in this skill of holding a conversation. So my question is this: how does one learn to talk to other people? Are there any certain things I can practice in order to get better at it?
Thanks for reading! :)