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I was assaulted and then bullied about it last school year. It's my senior year now and I am forced to go back to the same school as the people who have hurt me. My parents told me to just suck it up but when I had told my therapist about the fact that I still attended the school where those negative influences were, she didn't know what to say. She asked if the school was doing anything about it. I feel like she was more understanding than my parents. Now school is starting back up and I'm terrified to step back onto campus.
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Hey, you’re not the first nor the last in this situation. Suck it up ain’t the wat to treat things, but your parents apparently did not understand the depth of the impact this thing had on you.
If i were you, first of all, on the first day, i’d go to talk to the principle(director) and tell him that i believe that the bullies will not stop and that if they will harm me again even slightly your parents threatebed they will involve the authorities/police. And that you do not want this kind of fuss and you would kindly ask him/her to talk to the students in cause “en avant” so they will refrain from any interactions with you.
Second, i’ll start taking some self-defense courses, so i will grow a bit of confidence.
And third, i’ll analyse my fear. Why do you fear them? Because of the physical pain they caused? Was it the humilliation? The feeling of being powerless or weak in front of someone who takes advantage of it? think of war. Of ppl who were in really violent situations. They will make your agressors seem smaller. You will see them smaller. Your fear will become smaller.
And for myself, i learned not to fear people. Guess listening to Slayer from a young age helped:)
Good luck and remember, their strength is only as big as you allow it to get. So don’t. I believe you are strong enough. And you won’t be afraid anymore. I believe in you!
ReplyTell a school administrator. Don't go back into environments or associate around individuals you don't feel safe. Refuse to return until it is safe. Returning prematurely means you are accepting things the way they are. If you can't get your school to hear you tell law enforcement and report as a crime. Bullying is a crime, only unfortunately too many schools, police, and people treat it as just kids being kids. Don't feel you need to live in worry or fear. In California, for example, a student must be kept safe from the moment a student steps out the door until he or she returns home. Schools sometimes don't want to be saddled with the responsibility and try to dump the responsibility on kids to self police. If someone is threatening you or hurting you call 911 or whatever is your emergency response telephone number. You don't have to make this into a game bullies want to manipulate you into thinking you have to do. Even if someone does what is called a strong arm robbery (takes your property without using or displaying a weapon), even if it's only a piece of paper, call the police. You have the law on your side and no school employee can say otherwise for you standing up for your rights. Learn to speak up for yourself and call your local crime advocacy people too. No one deserves to have to live unfairly afraid of anyone.
ReplyI want to add in many communities any student who even threatens, harasses, intimidates, stalks, even gestures to another person in a way to cause another person to feel unsafe is guilty of a crime. This crap some schools play of trying to teach students to just "suck it up," "resiliency," or find coping skills to kowtow like learn self defense technique has to stop. It's not a student's job to do a teacher's duty. Also, just bcause a crime happened last year does not let the bulliy or bullies off the hook, even if the school says they resolved the matter (because if you are still living in a state of intimidation, worry, or fear the crime is ongoing), know what are called "statutes of limitations" can cause law enforcement to have to legally address issues that happened even in the past. Just because it happened two years ago doesn't give a criminal a free pass now. Sadly, children are the biggest unreported serious crime victims in the world. They are also the biggest perpetrators too. Don't get buried into a world of thinking you have to learn marital arts, learn to run, learn to hide, learn to hand over to others what isn't theirs to have. No student should have to live in fear of a classmate or even an adult. Report and demand adults do their job to provide you safe, responsible, and respectful learning place as required by law.
ReplyOkay so it may be different where you live but I live in England and I was severely bullied at school to the point that I was jump ON school property and outside on a few occasions DON'T ask the principle to talk to them as that will just make it worse for you but DO talk to him as he can talk to the teachers and get them to keep an eye on you this way if anything does happen they will see it and the thing with your parents I understand completely my dad's ex army and his answer was always fight back or stand up for yourself so I know how you feel in that respect but talk to your mum in depth about what they did what they said I would hope that she would be more worried and take more of an active role if she knew everything and how it has effected you as a person mentally and physically if you need someone to talk to I'm here you're not alone and I would advice self defence classes or mixed martial arts boxing or kickboxing not only so you know how to defend yourself but it's a good way to release your frustration and anger. I hope this helps but like I said don't ask them to talk to them unless they have seen something happen otherwise they lie and you end up being the one under the microscope and THAT is how stupid the school system is.
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