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Shadowed by males (& their female friends) when I go out... they hover within reach, or ride the elevator both ways staring at me the whole time, or quickly grab the railing on the bus to get up right after they notice I have, or yell foul language from cars or try to chat me up wherever they can. The Africans and Arabs boldly talking into or texting on their phone while keeping both eyes on me, a moving target, the Indians looking guilty but following me closely, the Caucasians trying to act casual while repeatedly "accidentally" crossing my path, the Latinos trying to gauge through chatter whether I'm with a "friend" or not.
It's been months. I've tried to tell others, and taken steps to confirm the stalking, but most people I confide in do not identify with the experience. I'm not going to run away, or give another person the keys to run my life. However, I have adults/staff members at school behaving as though they were complicit (a.k.a. either being threatened or "matchmaking"), including one who took pleasure in insinuating that I wasn't good or clever enough, then asking whether I was alone. (Her eyes gleamed with pleasure at my admission.)
I'm dealing with multiple insecure and manipulative personalities, most of whom are skilled with computers and refuse to take a lack of interest or no for an answer. I need help, support and sensible answers.
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I'm so sorry that you are being put through all of this, and made to feel alone.
Firstly, I believe you.
Secondly, as their goal may be to isolate you, you will have to keep reaching out to people. Before launching into conversation or answering a question, however, take your time (breathe) and think about the person (do you actually trust them or do you have to put in the effort to), the type of question, whether you want to give an answer at all or whether the better option would be to assert yourself (question their motives) and walk away.
Note: If someone tells you that you're not good or clever enough, they're usually giving you a description of themselves.
ReplyLove it!
ReplyThank you.
How do I go about gathering proof, or get the police involved?
ReplyNote: Keep a record.
ReplyIt's stunning to me that anyone would do this to someone. Any one who has family or a loved one would not want it to happen to themselves or anyone they love. Can't believe anyone, would care enough to tell you. They care more about belonging in a group & themselves. Amazing lack of human compassion. I understand & truly sorry you are going through this. I pray someone will have the balls to stand up & speak up.
ReplyTypo. Can't believe no one wouldnt care enough to tell you. They should if they have a beating heart. Inhuman to treat anyone that way.
ReplyInteresting how you group people according to their race.
ReplyIn trying to summarize and keep personal details out, I left out some of them. Thanks for the reminder!
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