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I have realized that I am the girl and daughter of the family that everyone looks up to. I mean it is great to know they Look up to me, but I think that is where my sadness begins. Honestly, I can’t do anything without automatically thinking, “what is my family going to say?” I feel limited. I feel stuck in a place I can’t be myself or make a mistake without disappointing then. I want to cry most of the time, but how??? If they see me they will instantly ask if there is something wrong and sometimes I just want to pour out my emotions by myself. I don’t think I want to tell my family what goes through my head because I feel like I know them pretty well and I know most of their responses. I am 21 and there are times I just want to go out and talk with someone else. Just leave the house for a while without having to worry what they will say after I get back. Or explining that the guy that I went with to eat is just a FRIEND! I really dont go out mainly because I dont have more friends that would accompany me. I have a very close friend and I am grateful for having her, but she already has her own life. We hang out like going shopping, movies or eating, but I would also like those late nights of being crazy and chill. And no I dont have a boyfriend. I have always wish to find that guy by accident like in the movies. I’m going to continue hoping, but how will those romantic encounters happen if I do not go out and if I do it’s with my mom or sister or both. I mean I don’t mind, but as an introvert, I can’t just leave and go somewhere by myself to have fun and meet new people. DAMN writing it sounds more depressing. I have lots to say and many gaps to fill, but I would also preffer to say everything instead of writing.
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Come on dawg beat it.It doesn't matter what others say or think.If you Feel something is right just do it and if you Feel something is wrong don't do it cause feelings never lie unlike our thoughts.
Replyi can relate. on just about everything you say. even though u don't know me , i'm here for u and to listen. i wanna help
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