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I'm not sure why I do it. Maybe it's because my family is $65,000 in debt but whenever I earn money, I give it to my mom and give a lame excuse of me finding it in a random place. For example- I have a babysitting job that pays $8 an hour and in 1 day, I get payed about $64-$80 depending on when she(the little girl I watch) gets picked up. Later that day around 9 pm, I go over to my mom and hand her the $80 that I made that day and then told her that I had found it on top of the washing machine.
Since then, I've been placing money around her room where she will find it aka in her jewelry box, on her bedside table, and on her desk. She did ask me at one point if I had been placing money in her room and me being the bad liar I am said no and that I had to use the bathroom. So far, I've given her around $285 and surprisingly, she doesn't ask questions. Honestly, I don't know why I do it to her and sometimes my dad but he asks questions if i continuously do it so I mostly just do it to my mom. The only reason why I do it, is because I feel bad about the situation. They're my parents! I want the best for them and here I am taking their money that they've worked for and spending it on clothes and shoes. Even though I rarely go shopping because I don't enjoy it, I still feel bad. I only reason I try to give them money secretly is because I don't want them to think that I feel that I need to do this when I don't.
My mom is amazing, loving, talented, and an all around great mom. My dad isn't around much but when he is, he's fun and loves watching movies. Even if they say that they don't need help, I still offer because they raised me with a roof over my head and food in my mouth. Because of them, I'm a hard working, well mannered, goofball. I may only be in 7th grade and they might think that I don't understand what's happening but I do and I just wanna help when I can.
I think I know why I do it know but the odd thing is, is that I have no idea why I try to hide it. I enjoy avoiding praise even when it comes to minor things like cleaning the kitchen, taking out the trash, putting shoes away, or doing simple favors. I just want people to stop saying thank you to me or complimenting me. It makes me feel weird and embarrassed for some reason. I prefer if more people were like my sister who will ask me to do something, I'll do it, look at her, and she just nods in approval. That probably makes her sound snobby but it makes me feel more comfortable. This was really long but if you have advice, please provide it.
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keep going, i wont praise you because you dont like it even tho i really want to. you will grow into a very successful and loved man. trust me.
but, i think it's ok if you sometimes just smile or chuckle or say "yaass" when ppl thank or praise you. it's just a little attitude that will make them happy and not so guilty for making you doing them favor. let them know that youre pleased to do a favor.
ReplyI don't have much advice for you but I do know what your going through. I have a very similar situation except I can't give money to my parents cause I can't get a job yet and I babysit for free (cause its family and mom makes me)but I feel so selfish sometimes... so I guess we both just have to wait it out until we can do something about it or until things get better. sending you love <3
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