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Dear M.M.A
I wish I could forgive you but I don’t know if I can, you hurt at my most vulnerable state and shattered my heart.
But I know that this is also partially my fault. I was young and naive only centered around the idea of trying to find a boyfriend so that I know I’m loved. I saw you and was instantly infutuated by your physical and mental attributes. However I know now that you don’t need someone to be happy and well I also did find someone who is objectively better than you.
However I do want to forgive you... but... you hurt me even when you should have known better. I had exhausted myself trying to have the courage to speak to you and even asking you out but my best friend told me all the shallow thing you thought of me. Avoiding me, wanting the date only to tell me that you don’t want anymore to do with me, finding me annoying. Not to mention you were leading me on and only wanted attention. I had also developed depression during all of this; I would go home an cry because I thought I would never find love, not enjoying activities I would normally enjoy anytime I thought of you. I was so stupid not to see the clear signs that you had no interest in me. Anytime I would talk to you, your responses were cold and distant and never contributing to the conversations. I wish I had the knowledge back then that you were never interested in me, could have saved myself a year of misery. I want to forgive you but i still see the same immature person that shattered my heart years ago. I’m not sure why I want to forgive you, maybe there’s a part of me that still likes you I suppose.
Sincerely me
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