Understatement

1 (800) - 273 - 8255

I try to distract myself with my music, but I constantly deny and lie to myself that the true distractions are my thoughts and the depression that comes with them. I don't understand how I get to this point. I only know that it usually occurs at night.

People tell me that "everything will be okay", and that I'm "not alone". Even though I know deep down they're not wrong, I constantly deny them. I appreciate them trying to help and be there for me, but what they don't understand is that people like me know I'm not alone, but that is how I physically feel. I don't know about anyone else, but I haven't found my "offramp" from depression. It definitely isn't anyone's fault, but I don't believe that anyone can help me either.

I haven't seen a therapist since I was 6, and I don't plan on going back.

My senior year of high school (last year) I had family members tell me that I'm not mentally stable. They're not wrong, but I don't think they needed to bring up the fact that other people can see it.

--------As you can see, both above and below, I have provided the suicide hotline number. Please use it if it is needed. --------

Again, I don't think anybody can help me - because I have been dealing with it for so long, and nothing has helped so far - so I suppose I should keep it up to myself to seek my true "happiness".

For those of you that know anybody with depression, stay close. Don't let them be depressed. It causes so many more problems than what it needs to be.

Stay happy. Stay real.

1 (800) - 273 - 8255