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I feel like a failure. Let me correct that actually, I am a failure. I failed twice and so they kicked me out of med school at the end of last year and I feel like I've ruined my life. And it was all my fault. I ruined my life and I have no idea what to do next. My parents keep reminding me of how much of a failure I am every single day. It's not like I'm already crying every night about how I feel like I've ruined my life. They always had these expections of me and it always felt like a big weight to carry. But then today they said that they have no expectations of me anymore. And you know what? That's even worse. It feels like they've given up on me completely. It feels like they don't believe I can do anything in my life. I've started another degree, in the hopes that maybe I can get my grades back up and they'll let me back into med. But what if it it's not enough? What if i'm just wasting another year of my life? I just keep thinking that it's not going to work and that I've already ruined my life. There's no going back to my dream career now. I haven't talked to my friends in quite a while (a few months now). I know, I know. It's bad and I shouldn't be isolating myself. But I tend to do that. I keep thinking why would they want to be friends with a failure? They are all going to graduate med school soon and here I am a total failure.
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i dont think youre a failure...
ReplyIt feels impossible to see that it now, but them relieving you of expectations is intended to relieve you of some of that emotional burden. You will get there. It will not be a wasted year unless you let it be. A lot of people take indirect routes to get to their goal, and usually it helps shape the outcome into something more unique, profound, and dynamic. Force yourself to talk to friends. Force yourself to get outside of the internal headspace. I think that what you turn this into will also help other see that just because your path doesn't follow a linear trajectory, doesn't mean it's not a successful path. Trust that in the end, people will be able to realize that.
ReplyVery sound advice.
ReplySometimes we fail and are forced to take a step back, just to get that running jump to be successful in the end. Don’t let your parents make you feel this way. I know that that’s really, really hard, but they’re basically the reason why you feel like this- like a failure. And no, you’re not a failure. You’re just human. And humans aren’t perfect. And just because you had this setback doesn’t mean that you’ll never accomplish anything or reach your goal. Just because it’ll take you a little more time than your friends doesn’t mean anything. A year isn’t much. Don’t worry, okay? And talk to your friends. If they’re your friends, then I think that they’d be worried about you and not think anything bad. So try, please. It’ll help.
ReplyHey, do you want to talk? Maybe I can offer some support, or at least a new friend? I don't think you are a failure, not at all. Think of it this way: because you have stayed in longer you've gotten a better grasp of the studies, more than if you had just memorized it all for a test and then graduated. You're also experiencing new things, meeting new people, and trying to find your own way. That's better than rushing through something only to find out you don't enjoy it
ReplyYou are having a hard time, but you are NOT a failure. My favorite saying of all time "What if I fall? But my Darling, what if you fly." When I am scared for failure, I think of the saying and I do it. And guess what. I fly!... Most of the time. Sometimes I fall, sometimes I fall over and over. Think about it this way. You are skiing. Most others when skiing, tend to fall when the ground is perfectly flat, not on hills. But, when you are skiing, after you fall, your only choice is to get back up and try again. THEN you succeed!
ReplyThey have no expectations the only place to go is up it hurts I know the emotional pain but if your parents call you a failure than there just plain bad parents you don’t need there respect or approval. You need to do what makes you happy and what you think is good enough for you and if it’s not the only thing you can do is keep trying.
Replyplease seek help, it does get better, trus me, iv been wher u are.. tell someone, call a Crisis numbr.. when we feel lik that emotions cloud our judgmnt, you CAN get help, ppl DO care, things CAN get better...
our mind lies to us tellin us things makin us paralysd to help ourslvs...the mind is potent
you’re not wat u think u are, it all stems from emotions.... as negative as u may think or feel
our mind is an illusion...why shud we believe our own thoughts? belief does wonders...to believe in something postiv about urself..even one thing can change ur sequence of thoughts. humans r not hard-wired to hate themselves. ur great !! believ it! spreading postivity n luv! i hope u can get the professinl help u need.
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