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I tell others it'll be okay, but inside I'm slowly breaking. I tell my friend not to starve herself, but I can't stop thinking about the numbers on the scale. I tell others to be themselves, but I want to change everything about me. I once told my friend no one cares if she's starting to break out, but there's voices and echoes saying even if I DIDN'T have acne I'd still look ugly. I say to my friends looks don't matter, but inside I wonder, what if they do matter? I always help others and encourage them. I try to be kind to everyone no matter how rude they are to me. I try to be confident when I'm almost always on the verge of tears. But it doesn't matter anymore. They just use me. They take me for granted, as that ugly nerdy girl that just makes people feel better about themselves. Not just because of the words she says, but just by standing next to her. They look down to me. They always have. There's nothing I can do. I've considered death many times before, but I'm just not strong enough to go through with it. I think about the people who care about me and how I'll hurt them. Then I wonder who does care for me?
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Make them see you then. I went through that too. I hated myself and people just cared about themselves. So I started to say, " I look pretty good day, all things considered. And I kinda like my hair." Be the person that looks in the mirror and winks back with a giant smile (like in the movies). You already are that person, you just need a key to unlock that part.
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