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I was w my bf yesterday and he admitted to me and his sister that his favorite thing to joke about is depression and suicide. He doesn’t know this but i have a diagnosis of depression and have been suicidal for a while. Anytime I tell someone this they either don’t care or turn on me and never talk to me again. I don’t know what to do, if I should do anything, I just wanted to get it out since it bugs me a little
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Tell him about it. I know it may be difficult as you have got no understanding until now. But try to talk to him about it. If he still jokes about it that shows he doesn't care about you. If that happens its upon you to decide what your next step will be.
Replyhello,
I hope you are well and that you are treating yourself as well as you can.Having people like this in your life will not be good for your mental health , especially when it hits close to home. I think it is important that you remove the negativity from your life (your boyfriend) and try to surround yourself with a positive environment and people (though I understand that this is easier said than done). If the people you have trusted to tell about your mental health and they do not care , they are not worth your time or heart ache. I know you must feel so alone but please please please know that you are important to someone. I hope I helped even a little .
-lotte
ReplyI would talk to him about it. A lot of people joke about what they are trying to hide as a defense mechanism. He might be doing so because he doesn't want to deal with his feelings either.
Don't be surprised if he isn't ready to hear it from you either. At least make it be known so you don't end up in an abusive relationship.
ReplyWith regards to your depression and suicidal thoughts... I was feeling low and was doing a lot of reading in forums like this. I came accross a psychologist who shared his experience of treating family members and loved ones who had to deal with the aftermath of a suicide. This psychologist noted that when contemplating suicide, it is important to think deeply about the people whom your suicide will affect. I took this to heart, and tried my best to imagine myself as a friend of mine learning of my own suicide. I thought about all the little things he might wonder for the rest of his life... If he had gone to the beach with me that one day, maybe he could have helped me turn it around... Maybe he would realize the real reason why I told him I don’t want to own a gun, and wish he could have seen through the excuses I gave, like it was too expensive. I thought about how these thoughts might plague him - after all, thoughts like that would plague me if someone close to me killed themselves. Then I tried to imagine myself as my mom... That was obviously hard. But it allowed me to put off suicidal thoughts for a little longer, which is sometimes all you need. Now, your boyfriend... Try to have an honest conversation with him. This is not just to get your thoughts on the table, but a test to see how he responds... Recently a girl broke my heart and she refused to acknowledge or talk to me about it when I tried to have an honest convo... It hurt badly, but her lack of sympathy and inability to communicate honestly sort of speaks for itself.
ReplyI suggest you tell him, if you really feel that way he needs to know. If he leaves, fuck him. He doesn't deserve you.
Reply